From the Mouths of Babes

Many of you have asked how are boys are handling the adoption and what do they think about it.  Well, it's been fun hearing what comes out of their mouths!  The boys have been talking about Lily for well over a year now.  They pray for her every night on their own.  They pray for the adoption process and for her health and safety.  We talk about how she won't understand us and that we will need to use some sign language.  Noah asks, "will she cry in OUR language?"  And of course I answered, "oh yes...that is a language we ALL understand.";)

Jake has a heart of gold.  This kid wants to take care of everyone including me.  He has taken over the "man of the house" role when Daddy is traveling.  As soon as he gets home from school, he picks up a shovel and starts shoveling the driveway and sidewalks.  He takes out the trash without me even asking (or the trash being full).   He takes pride in his work...just like Daddy. So there is no doubt that he can not wait to take care of his little sister.  He has loved her from the beginning of this journey.  I was a little concerned with whether Noah would like his little sister or not.  In the beginning I would ask him if he was excited to get a little sister and he would reply with a simple "no."  But over time, his heart opened up to Lily.  And just last weekend he asked us (in his language using w sound instead of L), "how wong will it take to bring Wilwee (Lily) home?"  We answered... then asked him, "why? is that too long?"  He replied  "no...besides, I realwee (really) wuv Wilwee (Lily)."

Some deep questions have risen with the topic of adoption from our kids.  The other day as I was driving, Noah and I were sitting in silence with our own thoughts.  All of a sudden, Noah pipes up with a question.  "Momma, what happens to those people that don't have their baby anymore?"  After clarifying with him that he was talking about the biological parents of the adoptees, I relieved his concern.  I explained to him that nothing happens TO them.  They continue to love that baby from a distance.  But it was out of unsurmountable tremendous love that those parents gave their baby to someone that could love them just as much but also provide them a better life that they could not get otherwise.  I think about all those biological parents...and Lily's.  I pray that God's peace pours into them and covers them like a warm blanket.  A warm blanket that protects them from any guilt, shame or condemnation.  I can not imagine and I'm sure I can not adequately describe in words what their sacrifice felt like...but it was within the realm of a sacrifice IN love.  I realize that there are some stories that don't match the above...but that is not for me to judge.  Either way...without them, adopting parents & families would not have the incredible gift of children & the Divine love that comes with it.

Lily was left in a waiting room of a train station.  To leave her there means her parents wanted her to be found.  They wanted her to have a chance for a better life.  I believe that and I choose to believe the best in people.  And it just so happens that the blog just before this one (called "Confirmation!") has a picture of a bunny & a sign I made before we even knew Lily OR her story...which reads,  "Waiting for you."  She was waiting in a train station waiting room...and we were waiting for her to be found.  Another confirmation of God's plan.  She was meant for our family (AND she likes to travel ;)

The best way I can describe the love that Dale & I have for our children came out of our child's mouth.  Our bedtime ritual consists of a book, prayer and telling them how much we love them.  As I told both Jake and Noah that I love them "all the way to the moon and around the moon a zillion times and back", I was trumped by Noah telling me, "Momma, I love you all the way to God & Jesus."
We certainly learn from our children and learn from our mistakes in parenting but the greatest we receive from our children is their faith & love.  We lead by example...but if I'm not open-minded and open-hearted to what God has to teach me (even through our children)...then what am I doing here?
1Cor 13:13 "And now these three remain:  faith, hope and love.  But the greatest of these is love."

CONFIRMATION!

I’m thrilled to announce that we are CONFIRMED to go to China and BRING LILY HOME!  We received confirmation on our China Consulate appointment and that means…THIS IS IT!  We are off to China in 2 1/2 weeks!  And we shall have our Lily in our arms on March 10th!  It’s been a year and 1/2 since the official start of our journey and we can’t wait to bring her home to meet her big brothers and family & friends!

This confirmation reminds me of SO many confirmations along the way in this amazing yet challenging journey.  

One confirmation that particularly stands out happened 1 year ago TODAY!  Dale, the boys and I took a family vacation to Beaver Creek CO for President Day’s weekend.  It would be the first time the boys would ski and they were very excited.   I was very excited too and was already wishing that Lily was with us.  We had not been “matched” with Lily yet so we had no picture of her.  But we certainly already had immeasurable love in our hearts for her!  Anyway, she had been on my mind and I had been a bit discouraged with the wait, the paperwork and the anxiety that goes with it.  It’s not an easy process but we knew it was well worth it and we knew it was God’s plan for us (that’s a whole other story I hope to write about soon).  But like I said…I was a little discouraged.  So I prayed for encouragement from God.  I never thought really to do that before…but I’m a firm believer!  And boy did He ever answer my prayers!!!

So on the first night at our hotel, Noah and I were walking and waiting for Dale and Jake.  We passed by this cute shop with a window full of stuffed animals.  Well, naturally Noah wanted one and zoomed in there to see.  Immediately he picked out this snow white owl.  And my eye went straight to the cutest little white bunny with paisley like ears.  I picked it up and asked Noah…”who do you think would like this bunny?”  And Noah answered, “Lily.”  I was thrilled he answered that because I thought the same!  There was only 2 left of those bunnies.  I told Noah that if he did well in his first day of ski school that we would come back tomorrow to get the owl for him and the bunny for Lily.  He agreed.

Well, the next day the boys did great in ski school.  We were so proud of them!  And Noah was quick to remind me of what I promised!  So before dinner we all went to the cute shop.  Noah went straight to his owl and I picked up the cute paisley eared white bunny for Lily.  I noticed that this was the LAST one.  Someone had purchased one since the night before.  Dale took the 2 stuffed animals and as we all turned to walk toward the register our mouths dropped to the floor (at least me and Dale’s did).  Dale’s head whipped around to look at me with that look of …do you see what I see?  And I gave a huge smile with tears in my eyes with a silent look of “yes”!  There in front of us (the only ones in the store) was a family of five….a mother, father , 2 boys the age of Jake and Noah (the younger one holding a white owl like Noah’s) and a little asian girl holding the other cute paisley eared white bunny just like Lily’s.

And I knew.  I knew that THAT was no coincidence.  I knew that THAT was my confirmation from God…our encouragement that we really truly needed.  It was God’s way of saying…"This is really happening and here’s what your family will look like…THIS is what I always planned for you.”  Confirmation & encouragement!  Thank you thank you thank you!

What to Expect When We're Expecting :)

Well, there's not really a book to go with this! Even though I don't show it...I feel like I've been pregnant 18 months and about to have a 23 pounder! We have a lot of questions coming our way from everyone. So I thought I'd try to answer some of them the best way I know how right now (by faking it! j/k ha ha!). We don't have dates in concrete yet for travel to China but it looks like early March. We are waiting for final appointment date from the China Consulate which happens one or two days before we travel back to the US. In trying to answer some questions...a lot of you think we are going to one city in China. Actually we will be moving to 3 different cities for sure. We will arrive in Beijing for a few days. Then we travel to Xinyang City to get Lily on day 5. She is in an orphanage there. We are there for a few days and then traveling to Guangzhou. As you know...China is rather large...so these cities are spread out. I think we fly to each of them (or train?). There are several appointments in our time there. There is a medical visit, passport visit, interviews on why we want to adopt her...and it's a process to get her Visa to come home. Day 5 is the day I dream about. IT is called "GOTCHA DAY." I have a fantasy in my head on how she will react when we finally meet her. But I can't write it. I'm sure you get the idea. We have read several scenarios on how adoptees might react. One is the "ideal" scenario...and the others...not so much. This is to prepare us. One of my worst fears is if she "shuts down" on us. That would break my heart...but worse is the feeling that we are breaking her heart. We will be taking her from everything she knows and the caretakers that she loves to a really beautiful life. But she won't understand that for awhile. And we certainly won't understand her & her Chinese words. I continually pray that deep down...God planted the "seed" of us in her heart. I pray that she has seen our pictures over and over and that her caretakers have helped her understand who we are. I pray that she will recognize us as her "ma ma" and "baba" (daddy). We have loved her from day 1 which was the day we officially decided to adopt. But her Day 1 starts with "Gotcha Day." Please pray for all of us. The boys will keep with their routine at home with an army of family and friends helping us and "manning" the household. We are so blessed with everyone stepping forward to help out. I know that they will be loved on immensely. We will Skype hopefully daily with them. Many have asked what they can get as a gift for Lily...what does she need? Good question and that is so thoughtful! Honestly, I have not thought enough on it. A few people have mentioned that we should register for those needs. That feels kinda odd b/c it is our 3rd child but I do understand why too (being a girl) and just not knowing what to get her or what we have and don't have. We did get rid of most all of our baby gear because we did not really offically plan for this. At this time...we do not have much girl clothing (or even undies, socks, shoes...etc). I am leaning toward registering for items such as stroller, sleeping monitor...etc ( we have none of these). So stay tuned. I will let you know for sure. I also will let you all know about donating new or lightly used baby/toddler clothing and blankets to the orphanage. I plan to take an extra suitcase full of these items to donate to Lily's orphanage. They are in need. I really want to to see where she has lived all of her life. I hope they let me in. My heart bleeds for those babies that still need a mother & father. Please pray for them...and good families to adopt them. In case you are interested in where Lily comes from...here is a brief overview: Xinyang is located in the south of Henan Province, next to Hubei Province. It is one of the locations from which Chinese civilization originates and has a long history of 8,000 years. Xinyang city has a beautiful landscape and natural tourism resources. Maojian, the city’s famous tea, is produced here. You can google a map of Xinyang. Climate; Weather: Xinyang is located in the south of the Qinling Mountains, the transitional area between subtropical and warm-temperate zones. The weather is moderate and has four distinctive seasons. The yearly average temperature is mid 50's F. Language in Xinyang: The dialect of Xinyang is a branch of the northern dialect family, but is also deeply influenced by the southern dialects, due to its location connecting Henan and Hubei province God Bless. xoxo